Earlier this year I mentioned that jparks and I were toying with the idea of moving to Austin and now I find myself in Austin, scouring real estate listings real estate listings mapping out open houses. Someone send help in the form of vodka, but preferably not sparkling pink, made for 16 year old girls vodka.
For the past few months I've been wrestling with if we should stay in California and continue to live in a tiny, very crowded house or move to Austin, where the houses are bigger, but life becomes an unknown. It should be noted that I'm a little afraid of the unknown and I hate our tiny, very crowded house so the right decision is totally not obvious. Also, I loathe making big decisions. Add it all together and it equals me with an stress ulcer. Fun!
To back up a bit, about a month ago we booked a trip to Austin when we were not sure that moving here was really an option. In that time we realized moving was a very real option and we decided to get some real estate investigating done on said trip. But! But! I'm trying to do all my own research on housing without talking to a real estate agent and without really knowing the area because I don't want to get a third party professional involved. I call it the shoe salesman situation. When in a shoe store, if I sort of kinda like a pair of shoes and the salesperson brings them out, chances are I'll buy them because he went through the trouble of finding them, I've gone through the trouble of trying them on, and they've gone through the trouble of being pretty cute. This is why I don't screw around with shoe stores and stick to zappos. I just know that we'll be browsing open houses and BAM! I'll find a house I sort of like and the agent will start talking and next thing you know I'll be the proud owner of a pretty cute house in Austin.
So we're doing it on our own, which does mean a lot more work for me and this does lower our chances of moving since I am pretty lazy. In fact "I'm lazy" should go in the con column for Austin because ugh, this really is snowballing into a lot of work. Why can't I just do a real estate search for "homes near Rudy's Breakfast Tacos"? Or "homes in the part of Austin that is livable, won't drive me crazy, and won't make me regret moving" because I don't know where that section of town is and finding it just seems like it might take longer than the week I'm here. Added bonus if this perfect fantasy neighborhood is in a good school district because oh yeah, I have that kind of thing to worry about too.
Maybe a tiny, very crowded in California isn't so bad after all.
Showing posts with label in which I go on holiday. Show all posts
Showing posts with label in which I go on holiday. Show all posts
Saturday, April 17, 2010
Thursday, June 11, 2009
I never would have guessed that I'm a SoCal kind of girl
Despite living in California for three years, I've never really ventured outside of the Bay Area. When jparks and I plan vacations, we tend to want to travel to places that require passports and plane rides or we head back to NOLA to visit family. We've both been itching for a vacation and since I had to make the drive down to Los Angeles to pick up my limping husband, I figured we should make a short vacation out of it. After consulting with someone that actually knows about Southern Cal, I booked us three nights in the Laguna Beach/Dana Point area. Holy crap, that Whoorl will not steer you wrong on vacation advice because the whole area was gorgeous.
Jparks' knee was really swollen and walking on uneven ground was not really an option, so we never made it to the beach, but that didn't stop us from lounging about while doing nothing. Our hotel room had two patios and one was large enough for two lounge chairs and a table, so we spent one afternoon on it, soaking up the sun. Or in my case, soaking up the shade while wearing SPF 50 and still getting sunburned. The only thing missing was a bottle of champagne.
We also carved out time to see a movie (The Hangover, which was pretty funny although totally ridiculous) and jparks was treated to a pedicure. When I picked him up from the ride he leaned in and whispered to me "I'm really looking forward to the pedicure" so I knew that even though I hadn't made us pedicure appointments, I would have to find a place to fit us in. And what do you know, I found a place:
The woman giving jparks his pedicure offered to give him a clear coat of polish but he was not on board for that. I didn't understand why not, I mean if you're getting a pedicure you might as well go all out. And it's clear polish, not red like I got.
All in all the four days away was wonderful and I am now hopelessly in love with that area. I expected extremely hot weather but was treated to temps lower than here in the perpetually cool Bay Area. Also the whole area was green and lush and I kept telling jparks that I want to live in Southern Cal where they take water for granted and have plenty of plants and trees. Not that we don't have green around here, but it's not nearly as wide spread. Damn us and our water conserving ways.
I can't wait to go back and hopefully next time jparks won't be a gimp so we can visit the beach, although I was told the water is too cold to go into without a wetsuit. Also, I can't wait to go back so we can go to Harbor House Cafe and have another monster banana split.
Jparks' knee was really swollen and walking on uneven ground was not really an option, so we never made it to the beach, but that didn't stop us from lounging about while doing nothing. Our hotel room had two patios and one was large enough for two lounge chairs and a table, so we spent one afternoon on it, soaking up the sun. Or in my case, soaking up the shade while wearing SPF 50 and still getting sunburned. The only thing missing was a bottle of champagne.
We also carved out time to see a movie (The Hangover, which was pretty funny although totally ridiculous) and jparks was treated to a pedicure. When I picked him up from the ride he leaned in and whispered to me "I'm really looking forward to the pedicure" so I knew that even though I hadn't made us pedicure appointments, I would have to find a place to fit us in. And what do you know, I found a place:
The woman giving jparks his pedicure offered to give him a clear coat of polish but he was not on board for that. I didn't understand why not, I mean if you're getting a pedicure you might as well go all out. And it's clear polish, not red like I got.
All in all the four days away was wonderful and I am now hopelessly in love with that area. I expected extremely hot weather but was treated to temps lower than here in the perpetually cool Bay Area. Also the whole area was green and lush and I kept telling jparks that I want to live in Southern Cal where they take water for granted and have plenty of plants and trees. Not that we don't have green around here, but it's not nearly as wide spread. Damn us and our water conserving ways.
I can't wait to go back and hopefully next time jparks won't be a gimp so we can visit the beach, although I was told the water is too cold to go into without a wetsuit. Also, I can't wait to go back so we can go to Harbor House Cafe and have another monster banana split.
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
snobbery at its best
This weekend jparks and I were in Austin for his best friend's Valentine's Day wedding. At first I wasn't really excited about a Valentine's Wedding (not that we do anything special for VDay) but then I realized that we would have a night of dinner and dancing and we wouldn't have to plan for it at all. That's a winning situation for two people that usually stay home to avoid the crowds on the 14th. In the future I plan on crashing other VDay weddings.
While the wedding was lovely, I do have one major complaint about this trip. In an effort to save money jparks and I booked the hotel room through hotwire. You know, hotwire where you don't learn your hotel room until you complete the booking process. Hotwire, where the star ratings are wrong. Hotwire, who wants you to die in your hotel room, so you can't complain about the crappy hotel they stuck you with.
Hotwire booked us at the La Quinta Inn off MoPac. Please keep in mind that I am a bit of a hotel snob, but I wasn't always. I can lower my standards in certain situations and this was one time when I was really trying to be open minded about the La Quinta Inn, mostly because no refunds were given for cancellations.
Thursday night was our first night at the La Quinta and I had to check in alone because jparks was off getting shitfaced at the bachelor party. I checked into my room and was happily settling in to watch 30 Rock, when I noticed that one of the two doors leading out looked like it had been kicked in. This particular door supposedly faced a courtyard, but since I was in the last room in the wing the door actually faced the parking lot. The top lock, which was one of these, was totally broken. The part that attaches to the door frame was missing, as well as a chunk of the frame. How in the hell much brute force does it take to break one of those locks? Seeing as I was alone until jparks drunkenly stumbled in, I figured it was not the best idea to push my luck and find out.
I asked the front desk to move me, and they happily did. I was settling into my new room when I walked into the bathroom to find a tub that looked scarier than most gym showers. The bottom of it was gray and gross and I could feel my toes rotting off just from looking at it. At this point what were my options? Go complain again? Move to another freaking room only to find out that the toilet was home to ass biting piranhas? Or that the sink only dispensed flesh melting acid? I decided to suck it up and deal with the tub. But not before letting slynnro and whitney know that should they never hear from me again please come claim my body at the lovely La Quinta Inn.
Did I mention that the room only had two double beds and that jparks was forced to not sleep with me? Because seriously, you can't go from sharing a king sized bed with a person to sharing a double bed. Life does not work like that. Or that out of boredom I started looking up reviews of the hotel and found some gems that included "Hotel was nice until police started knocking on doors in the middle of the night. Never found out what was going on." Or "Four cars were vandalized in the parking lot. Hotel took no responsibility for this."
When all was said and done I did survive the weekend (obviously). We put a towel down on the floor of the tub every day and stood on that when we showered. I'm sure housekeeping loved us, but whatever. And to make up for the crappy room, I got jparks to upgrade us to first class for the flight home. Which was the best and the worst idea ever. First class is seriously awesome. So awesome I will never be able to fly coach again without a lot of whining about how I should be in first class. Where they hand out real silverware and hot towels. And your drinks come in real glasses. And the stewardess even knows your name and calls you Ms. Parks. Holy crap, first class is the land of milk and honey.
While the wedding was lovely, I do have one major complaint about this trip. In an effort to save money jparks and I booked the hotel room through hotwire. You know, hotwire where you don't learn your hotel room until you complete the booking process. Hotwire, where the star ratings are wrong. Hotwire, who wants you to die in your hotel room, so you can't complain about the crappy hotel they stuck you with.
Hotwire booked us at the La Quinta Inn off MoPac. Please keep in mind that I am a bit of a hotel snob, but I wasn't always. I can lower my standards in certain situations and this was one time when I was really trying to be open minded about the La Quinta Inn, mostly because no refunds were given for cancellations.
Thursday night was our first night at the La Quinta and I had to check in alone because jparks was off getting shitfaced at the bachelor party. I checked into my room and was happily settling in to watch 30 Rock, when I noticed that one of the two doors leading out looked like it had been kicked in. This particular door supposedly faced a courtyard, but since I was in the last room in the wing the door actually faced the parking lot. The top lock, which was one of these, was totally broken. The part that attaches to the door frame was missing, as well as a chunk of the frame. How in the hell much brute force does it take to break one of those locks? Seeing as I was alone until jparks drunkenly stumbled in, I figured it was not the best idea to push my luck and find out.
I asked the front desk to move me, and they happily did. I was settling into my new room when I walked into the bathroom to find a tub that looked scarier than most gym showers. The bottom of it was gray and gross and I could feel my toes rotting off just from looking at it. At this point what were my options? Go complain again? Move to another freaking room only to find out that the toilet was home to ass biting piranhas? Or that the sink only dispensed flesh melting acid? I decided to suck it up and deal with the tub. But not before letting slynnro and whitney know that should they never hear from me again please come claim my body at the lovely La Quinta Inn.
Did I mention that the room only had two double beds and that jparks was forced to not sleep with me? Because seriously, you can't go from sharing a king sized bed with a person to sharing a double bed. Life does not work like that. Or that out of boredom I started looking up reviews of the hotel and found some gems that included "Hotel was nice until police started knocking on doors in the middle of the night. Never found out what was going on." Or "Four cars were vandalized in the parking lot. Hotel took no responsibility for this."
When all was said and done I did survive the weekend (obviously). We put a towel down on the floor of the tub every day and stood on that when we showered. I'm sure housekeeping loved us, but whatever. And to make up for the crappy room, I got jparks to upgrade us to first class for the flight home. Which was the best and the worst idea ever. First class is seriously awesome. So awesome I will never be able to fly coach again without a lot of whining about how I should be in first class. Where they hand out real silverware and hot towels. And your drinks come in real glasses. And the stewardess even knows your name and calls you Ms. Parks. Holy crap, first class is the land of milk and honey.
Monday, September 29, 2008
I'm living off the grid
Holy crap, we are back in California, but not back in our house, because our house has no power. NO FREAKING POWER. Apparently our energy bill hasn't been paid in two months and I never noticed. I am so smart, S-M-R-T. It seems the power was shut off on Thursday or maybe Friday and we found out about this on Saturday, while we were in San Francisco for a wedding. After taking a few deep breathes to help me calm the fuck down, I realized that having no power is not the end of the world and that it means extending our vacation by one more day when while we stayed with friends. Plus, knowing that I would shortly be in a bar with a mighty strong drink in my hand, helped too.
I bet you're wondering what my final verdict is about our Adventure by Disney. (Shut up and play along, of course you've been waiting for this!) I'm going to give the trip a thumbs up and would even go so far as to recommend it to other folks. We made some great friends on the trip (click through and behold the Duke of Dill aka: the King of Pickles and Kevin, the only guy that can make jparks look like a saint), saw some amazing sites, stayed in magnificent hotels, drank good Guinness and whiskey, and came home with tons of stories to tell. If all of that isn't the mark of a great vacation then I don't know what is.
Since returning home, we've been smacked hard in the face my real life and it has not been pretty. But anytime I look at my Ireland pictures I smile and laugh about jparks being a dumbass and suddenly am ready to call Disney to book my next Adventure. Dorky? Yes, but it simply was an awesome vacation. Like for reals. And in Ireland I had electricity in all my hotel rooms. Well, except for the one room where I tried to use my hair dryer. Who knew that a power converter doesn't actually convert all appliances?
I bet you're wondering what my final verdict is about our Adventure by Disney. (Shut up and play along, of course you've been waiting for this!) I'm going to give the trip a thumbs up and would even go so far as to recommend it to other folks. We made some great friends on the trip (click through and behold the Duke of Dill aka: the King of Pickles and Kevin, the only guy that can make jparks look like a saint), saw some amazing sites, stayed in magnificent hotels, drank good Guinness and whiskey, and came home with tons of stories to tell. If all of that isn't the mark of a great vacation then I don't know what is.
Since returning home, we've been smacked hard in the face my real life and it has not been pretty. But anytime I look at my Ireland pictures I smile and laugh about jparks being a dumbass and suddenly am ready to call Disney to book my next Adventure. Dorky? Yes, but it simply was an awesome vacation. Like for reals. And in Ireland I had electricity in all my hotel rooms. Well, except for the one room where I tried to use my hair dryer. Who knew that a power converter doesn't actually convert all appliances?
Monday, September 22, 2008
here's what I've been doing on vacation
And if I'm not doing that then I'm eating chocolate whiskey ice cream.
I love Ireland.
Thursday, September 18, 2008
vacation pictures! because they are so interesting!
you might have already read most of this post. When I opened my blog this morning something was up with it. This post had disappeared and when I finally found it, the last half was missing. I blame the weird Irish internet.
I’m sorry to report that my plan failed. Big Fail Whale, in fact. (I saw a guy wearing a Fail Whale shirt today and wanted to introduce myself to him. An Irish Fail Whale! So exciting!) I did sleep on the plane, but jparks did not. When we got to the hotel at 9:30am, we immediately went to the room and jparks decided to nap. I stayed up for awhile reading, but then finally caved in. I set an alarm to go off an hour later, but it didn’t work. We slept for 8 hours. So yeah, that first day here, not much happened. We did wake up in time to get dinner and drinks from a real Irish Pub. I had cider and ended up a bit tipsy, but since tipsy was my only goal for this trip, it’s safe to say I had a good time.
Today jparks and I woke up at 3am (fucking jet lag) and after trying to go back to sleep unsuccessfully, we watched tv until 5. After a quick run (running on vacation, I am so awesome) we headed out for the day. First we hit St. Stephens Green where I found the Oscar Wilde memorial and took a dorky picture:
After that we went to the Dublin Google office and I gorged on European chocolate bars. All I’m going to say is that the Dublin mini-kitchens kick the Mountain View mini-kitchens asses. And that we are dorks for visiting Google while on vacation:
After that we did some other stuff (that I can’t currently think of because I’m tired. And have been drinking) and then met the rest of our tour group for a dinner. I was a bit nervous about this because really, what kind of people go on Disney tours (I mean besides jparks and I), but the people at our table were nice. Older than us by about 20 years, but still nice. One of the guys owns a pickle company in New York and I was so excited by this that I proclaimed “I love pickles!” I’m hoping to have a pickle hook up by the end of this trip.
And that’s all I’ve got for now because I’m tried. And maybe my buzz is dying. And the jet lag is still kicking my ass a tiny bit.
If you care, there’s more pictures over here (although not many because uploading takes forever on our wifi here) and more being uploaded shortly.
I’m sorry to report that my plan failed. Big Fail Whale, in fact. (I saw a guy wearing a Fail Whale shirt today and wanted to introduce myself to him. An Irish Fail Whale! So exciting!) I did sleep on the plane, but jparks did not. When we got to the hotel at 9:30am, we immediately went to the room and jparks decided to nap. I stayed up for awhile reading, but then finally caved in. I set an alarm to go off an hour later, but it didn’t work. We slept for 8 hours. So yeah, that first day here, not much happened. We did wake up in time to get dinner and drinks from a real Irish Pub. I had cider and ended up a bit tipsy, but since tipsy was my only goal for this trip, it’s safe to say I had a good time.
Today jparks and I woke up at 3am (fucking jet lag) and after trying to go back to sleep unsuccessfully, we watched tv until 5. After a quick run (running on vacation, I am so awesome) we headed out for the day. First we hit St. Stephens Green where I found the Oscar Wilde memorial and took a dorky picture:
After that we went to the Dublin Google office and I gorged on European chocolate bars. All I’m going to say is that the Dublin mini-kitchens kick the Mountain View mini-kitchens asses. And that we are dorks for visiting Google while on vacation:
After that we did some other stuff (that I can’t currently think of because I’m tired. And have been drinking) and then met the rest of our tour group for a dinner. I was a bit nervous about this because really, what kind of people go on Disney tours (I mean besides jparks and I), but the people at our table were nice. Older than us by about 20 years, but still nice. One of the guys owns a pickle company in New York and I was so excited by this that I proclaimed “I love pickles!” I’m hoping to have a pickle hook up by the end of this trip.
And that’s all I’ve got for now because I’m tried. And maybe my buzz is dying. And the jet lag is still kicking my ass a tiny bit.
If you care, there’s more pictures over here (although not many because uploading takes forever on our wifi here) and more being uploaded shortly.
Monday, September 15, 2008
must. stay. awake.
It's almost 2am and I am still awake! My plan is going according to, eh, plan! (Sorry folks, words are apparently not my strong suit this late at night)
See, our flight leaves tomorrow, er, TODAY at 2:35pm. And since it's an overnight flight my plan is make myself so damn tired that I have no choice but to sleep on during the bulk of it. I think this is a brilliant idea. Jparks does not agree. He thinks I'll be tired and cranky and not able to fall asleep. He has not met my new best friend forever, Mr. Benadryl. My new friend is really good at knocking me out. And if that doesn't work, I'll have jparks read to me from one of his new Dungeons and Dragons books. The ten hour flight will fly by. (fly, flight. dude, at 2am I am cracking myself up)
I am mostly packed right now, with only toiletries and power cords for various electronic gadgets to toss into a bag in the morning. I have my airplane books picked out (in case I really can't sleep): The Audacity Of Hope and In The Woods. I have dvd's queued up for when I just can't read another word (good, fluffy dvds too. The first and second season of Beverly Hills, 90210. I'm kicking it old skool). Ireland, here I come. Lock up your whiskey and beer. And potatoes. mmm, potatoes.
I am ready for this damn vacation to start.
(On a side note, did you guys know today, er, yesterday was Monday. I did not. Seriously. I took today off to finish packing and totally forgot that other people had to work. I didn't realize that it was an actual work day until just a few minutes ago, even though I talked to some friends while they were at work. Am so smart.)
((Also, I went to see these shoes in person and the store was sold out of them in my size. Bitches. I could order them online, but they were on sale in the store and I now feel kinda dumb paying full price. le sigh))
See, our flight leaves tomorrow, er, TODAY at 2:35pm. And since it's an overnight flight my plan is make myself so damn tired that I have no choice but to sleep on during the bulk of it. I think this is a brilliant idea. Jparks does not agree. He thinks I'll be tired and cranky and not able to fall asleep. He has not met my new best friend forever, Mr. Benadryl. My new friend is really good at knocking me out. And if that doesn't work, I'll have jparks read to me from one of his new Dungeons and Dragons books. The ten hour flight will fly by. (fly, flight. dude, at 2am I am cracking myself up)
I am mostly packed right now, with only toiletries and power cords for various electronic gadgets to toss into a bag in the morning. I have my airplane books picked out (in case I really can't sleep): The Audacity Of Hope and In The Woods. I have dvd's queued up for when I just can't read another word (good, fluffy dvds too. The first and second season of Beverly Hills, 90210. I'm kicking it old skool). Ireland, here I come. Lock up your whiskey and beer. And potatoes. mmm, potatoes.
I am ready for this damn vacation to start.
(On a side note, did you guys know today, er, yesterday was Monday. I did not. Seriously. I took today off to finish packing and totally forgot that other people had to work. I didn't realize that it was an actual work day until just a few minutes ago, even though I talked to some friends while they were at work. Am so smart.)
((Also, I went to see these shoes in person and the store was sold out of them in my size. Bitches. I could order them online, but they were on sale in the store and I now feel kinda dumb paying full price. le sigh))
Tuesday, March 4, 2008
oh christmas tree
Today I noticed that one of our neighbors just put their Christmas tree out for garbage pick up. Why have I not met these neighbors yet?!? People that keep their Christmas tree up until MARCH are my kind of people.
Also, today I registered to register for the Nike Women's Marathon. Because I am dumb. And hate myself. Part of me really hopes I get picked to register. And part of me really likes watching tv on the couch while eating peanut butter and honey on crackers. I guess destiny will l decide what road I'm running down. (Get it, running down? I am so funny)
Last week jparks and I booked a trip to Ireland for September. We booked with a tour group because we are 90 years old. No, really we booked with a tour group because I hate vacation planning and jparks is too busy with work to properly research an international trip. And the tour group we booked with is um, well, god we are dorks, the trip is booked through Adventures by Disney. Like I said, we don't want to plan a vacation so tour group it was. And tour groups can be hit or miss but Disney's Disney, they've got to keep up their reputation, so their trip has to be good. Right? RIGHT? And the dates that we picked are adults only, so hopefully it'll be full of other couples around our age and not groups of grandparents. And look at all the places we'll get to go. Yay for vacation!
If you guys don't stop laughing at us for booking through Disney I'll go make new friends. New friends with Christmas trees still up.
Also, today I registered to register for the Nike Women's Marathon. Because I am dumb. And hate myself. Part of me really hopes I get picked to register. And part of me really likes watching tv on the couch while eating peanut butter and honey on crackers. I guess destiny will l decide what road I'm running down. (Get it, running down? I am so funny)
Last week jparks and I booked a trip to Ireland for September. We booked with a tour group because we are 90 years old. No, really we booked with a tour group because I hate vacation planning and jparks is too busy with work to properly research an international trip. And the tour group we booked with is um, well, god we are dorks, the trip is booked through Adventures by Disney. Like I said, we don't want to plan a vacation so tour group it was. And tour groups can be hit or miss but Disney's Disney, they've got to keep up their reputation, so their trip has to be good. Right? RIGHT? And the dates that we picked are adults only, so hopefully it'll be full of other couples around our age and not groups of grandparents. And look at all the places we'll get to go. Yay for vacation!
If you guys don't stop laughing at us for booking through Disney I'll go make new friends. New friends with Christmas trees still up.
Saturday, February 2, 2008
ears!
Tomorrow morning jparks and I will be boarding a plane for a vacation at the Happiest Place on Earth. I'm pretty excited:
The last time we were there I started this towards the end of the trip. This time I'm going in with my camera at the ready so I don't miss any of the trashy outfits. The weather channel says it will be cool while we are there, but I have faith that the sluts won't let me down!
The last time we were there I started this towards the end of the trip. This time I'm going in with my camera at the ready so I don't miss any of the trashy outfits. The weather channel says it will be cool while we are there, but I have faith that the sluts won't let me down!
Wednesday, January 9, 2008
HOME!
Holy crap, I've never been so excited to be home. Of course, my luggage wasn't ready to come home just yet, and has decided to take a vacation in Chicago. Dear luggage, I hope you are enjoying your stay! Please come home soon! Maybe bring some deep dish pizza with you!
And while I am so excited to be home, where all my lovely shoes are, I'm definitely going to miss being around family. Especially the goofy 5 year old family member in the video below teaching me and my sister in law how to crack up like a pig (please turn your head to the side as I am dumb and forgot that the digital camera doesn't auto rotate video):
Also, if anyone wants to buy or give me a real video camera, I would totally be cool with that.
And while I am so excited to be home, where all my lovely shoes are, I'm definitely going to miss being around family. Especially the goofy 5 year old family member in the video below teaching me and my sister in law how to crack up like a pig (please turn your head to the side as I am dumb and forgot that the digital camera doesn't auto rotate video):
Also, if anyone wants to buy or give me a real video camera, I would totally be cool with that.
Friday, January 4, 2008
Tuesday, January 1, 2008
mythbusting
Is there anyone out there that thought I was still young, cool, and hip? Yeah? Heh, let me provide just how silly of a thought that is.
Last night, on New Year's Eve, the biggest party night of the year, jparks and I hung out with some good friends and welcomed the new year by watching Star Trek: Deep Space Nine and playing Guitar Hero. And I totally enjoyed every minute of it. Sometimes staying in and doing dorky things while consuming champagne is more fun that being out at a crowded bar. Plus, bars don't like it if you light RoboDog at midnight. And it's not a party without RoboDog.
Happy 2008 ya'll. May you stick to your resolutions for longer than I stick to mine.
Last night, on New Year's Eve, the biggest party night of the year, jparks and I hung out with some good friends and welcomed the new year by watching Star Trek: Deep Space Nine and playing Guitar Hero. And I totally enjoyed every minute of it. Sometimes staying in and doing dorky things while consuming champagne is more fun that being out at a crowded bar. Plus, bars don't like it if you light RoboDog at midnight. And it's not a party without RoboDog.
Happy 2008 ya'll. May you stick to your resolutions for longer than I stick to mine.
Thursday, July 12, 2007
Let me tell you a little story
Once upon a time there was a boy and he was in lurve with a girl. They both had their own flickr accounts but when the girl posted pictures of the boy she only selected ones where he didn't look bad. The boy, on the other hand, posted any picture of the girl that he could. He didn't care if she looked bad, if her eyes were closed, or if every picture was exactly the same. He didn't care if she begged him not to give those pictures to the public, the bastard boy still posted them.
One night the girl came up with a plan. "I have a bunch of pictures of my love on the beach and in ponds without his shirt on. I could threaten to post them and then he would understand why I don't like it when he posts all those crappy pictures of me!"
Thrilled that she had come up with a way to stop the posting of unflattering pictures of her, the girl floated through the rest of her day. That night she laid down the law for the boy and he scoffed at her idea. Then he told hissecret lover best friend "She won't do it."
The girl responded with a hearty "Not only am I posting them, I'm sending links to TONS OF PEOPLE!"
This, dear friends, is where the story turns into a picture book.
"I wonder if she really will post those pictures of me?" thinks the boy.
"Uh oh, I think she really is posting those pictures. Maybe if I flex my guns and show her I'm a sexy beast she'll change her mind"
After recovering from a laughing fit over the boy's "guns", the girl continued to upload pictures.
"This picture is pretty identical to that other picture" the girl thought as she posted it.
"Sexy!" thought the girl.
"hmm, this picture of the boy running and jumping in the forest is best viewed at the large size so people can see his facial expression," thought the girl but she posted it anyway.
And finally the girl posted the last picture of the boy, a closeup of him lounging on the beach. "Hmm, he seems to have forgotten to take off his sweater," the girl thought.
As the girl finished uploading the pictures a great feeling of satisfaction washed over her. "HA!" she thought as she waited for the boy's reaction...
One night the girl came up with a plan. "I have a bunch of pictures of my love on the beach and in ponds without his shirt on. I could threaten to post them and then he would understand why I don't like it when he posts all those crappy pictures of me!"
Thrilled that she had come up with a way to stop the posting of unflattering pictures of her, the girl floated through the rest of her day. That night she laid down the law for the boy and he scoffed at her idea. Then he told his
The girl responded with a hearty "Not only am I posting them, I'm sending links to TONS OF PEOPLE!"
This, dear friends, is where the story turns into a picture book.
"I wonder if she really will post those pictures of me?" thinks the boy.
"Uh oh, I think she really is posting those pictures. Maybe if I flex my guns and show her I'm a sexy beast she'll change her mind"
After recovering from a laughing fit over the boy's "guns", the girl continued to upload pictures.
"This picture is pretty identical to that other picture" the girl thought as she posted it.
"Sexy!" thought the girl.
"hmm, this picture of the boy running and jumping in the forest is best viewed at the large size so people can see his facial expression," thought the girl but she posted it anyway.
And finally the girl posted the last picture of the boy, a closeup of him lounging on the beach. "Hmm, he seems to have forgotten to take off his sweater," the girl thought.
As the girl finished uploading the pictures a great feeling of satisfaction washed over her. "HA!" she thought as she waited for the boy's reaction...
Monday, July 9, 2007
a really long rant with no real purpose
Jparks and I are now back from vacation and I must say a good time was had by all. Towards the end of the trip we were both ready to head home, but generally everything was wonderful and we really enjoyed Maui.
Actually there was one thing that bothered me but it's not something that's specific to Maui, it's more of a general vacation complaint. Between dining out for every meal, all the drinks I got from the bar, and all of the shuttle rides from the airport to the rental car place, and from the rental car place back to the airport, I felt like I was being expected to tip a whole butt-load of money. And this really started topiss me off beyond belief annoy me.
Don't get me wrong, I'm all for tipping waiters. I know from experience how much it sucks to wait on a table and then find they've left you no tip. When that happened I always silently yelled in my head "dammit! Thanks for letting me pay to wait on you" because really, that's what happens. Waiters make a lower minimum wage than other workers thanks to their tips. An honest waiter, not wanting to piss off the IRS, will claim at least 10% of their total sales for the night for tax purposes. When you don't add a tip the waiter still has to claim some amount on your bill and, yes, another table probably has tipped more than enough to cover your not tipping, but still, the guilt, it kills me.
That being said sometimes it really burns my bottom when I'm expected to tip a person. Starbucks, I'm pointing fingers at you. It's well known that they rank high on the lists of best companies to work for, thanks to high hourly wage rates and great benefits. Most ones I've been in even have some kind of sign indicating that employees start at hourly wages well above the minimum wage. And yet, you will always find a tip jar sitting out. Call me mean, but I'm way more likely to tip at a small, independent coffee house that probably doesn't pay more than minimum wage than I am at Starbucks. I worked at a record store, making minimum wage with no benefits and I wasn't allowed to put out a tip jar. It took as much energy to not make fun of you for purchasing a Micheal Bolton cd as it takes a barista to not spit into your mocha latte and for that I deserved a tip.
But really, Starbucks is not what pushed me over the edge while in Maui (although we did spend some time in various Starbucks). What did it were the times I was supposed to tip the guy that drives the van from the airport to the rental car place. And the bartender that wants a tip every single time I order a drink, not just one tip that's enough to cover all my drinks for the day. And the tour guy that did an excellent job but dammit, the tour cost so much to begin with I didn't have money left over for a tip. And the servers that openly talked about a table that just left that didn't tip them. Hey, the food sucks and you are really a crappy server! If I didn't have the guilt I wouldn't have tipped you either! Those, my friends, are the things that pushed me over the edge.
In fact, I went so far over the edge that one day I tipped the loudmouth servers less than 15% of my bill just out of spite. How dare you talk about another table right out in the open. I'll show you! You only get a $4 tip today! Take that! And just so you know, I did feel pretty guilty after it was done.
I ended up not tipping the van drivers, even though one of them even had a couple of dollars stuck into his dashboard indicating "Hey you with the money, I would like a tip. Why? Um, because I drove this van without hitting a single person, and for that I rule! Now give me a dollar." I didn't give him a dollar. I'm sorry, but successfully driving a van does not earn you a tip. You didn't even get up from your seat to help with the luggage, in fact you had a little sign saying you weren't allowed to help with luggage. Screw you, no tip!
I feel the most guilty about not tipping the tour guide. He was really great, even giving us a free hat when jparks had to swim into a pond to retrieve a lost baggie of cocaine. But the tour was expensive. And it was one of those times when I wasn't really sure if tipping was appropriate. And I didn't think we had any cash. Just call us stupid tourists. If the guilt gets bad enough I might mail him a check as a late tip. Man, I'm a wimp.
I know there were other times jparks and I felt pressured into tipping (the bellman that drove us in the hotel van a fourth of a mile to the other part of the hotel) but resisted. Call us stingy, call us cheap, but sometimes tipping is not necessary.
Maybe I should start a virtual tip jar on my sidebar. Hey folks, I drove to work today without running anyone over, can I have a dollar? Maybe Lily can tip me each time I take her out to pee. Two bucks each trip should be acceptable, don't you think?
Actually there was one thing that bothered me but it's not something that's specific to Maui, it's more of a general vacation complaint. Between dining out for every meal, all the drinks I got from the bar, and all of the shuttle rides from the airport to the rental car place, and from the rental car place back to the airport, I felt like I was being expected to tip a whole butt-load of money. And this really started to
Don't get me wrong, I'm all for tipping waiters. I know from experience how much it sucks to wait on a table and then find they've left you no tip. When that happened I always silently yelled in my head "dammit! Thanks for letting me pay to wait on you" because really, that's what happens. Waiters make a lower minimum wage than other workers thanks to their tips. An honest waiter, not wanting to piss off the IRS, will claim at least 10% of their total sales for the night for tax purposes. When you don't add a tip the waiter still has to claim some amount on your bill and, yes, another table probably has tipped more than enough to cover your not tipping, but still, the guilt, it kills me.
That being said sometimes it really burns my bottom when I'm expected to tip a person. Starbucks, I'm pointing fingers at you. It's well known that they rank high on the lists of best companies to work for, thanks to high hourly wage rates and great benefits. Most ones I've been in even have some kind of sign indicating that employees start at hourly wages well above the minimum wage. And yet, you will always find a tip jar sitting out. Call me mean, but I'm way more likely to tip at a small, independent coffee house that probably doesn't pay more than minimum wage than I am at Starbucks. I worked at a record store, making minimum wage with no benefits and I wasn't allowed to put out a tip jar. It took as much energy to not make fun of you for purchasing a Micheal Bolton cd as it takes a barista to not spit into your mocha latte and for that I deserved a tip.
But really, Starbucks is not what pushed me over the edge while in Maui (although we did spend some time in various Starbucks). What did it were the times I was supposed to tip the guy that drives the van from the airport to the rental car place. And the bartender that wants a tip every single time I order a drink, not just one tip that's enough to cover all my drinks for the day. And the tour guy that did an excellent job but dammit, the tour cost so much to begin with I didn't have money left over for a tip. And the servers that openly talked about a table that just left that didn't tip them. Hey, the food sucks and you are really a crappy server! If I didn't have the guilt I wouldn't have tipped you either! Those, my friends, are the things that pushed me over the edge.
In fact, I went so far over the edge that one day I tipped the loudmouth servers less than 15% of my bill just out of spite. How dare you talk about another table right out in the open. I'll show you! You only get a $4 tip today! Take that! And just so you know, I did feel pretty guilty after it was done.
I ended up not tipping the van drivers, even though one of them even had a couple of dollars stuck into his dashboard indicating "Hey you with the money, I would like a tip. Why? Um, because I drove this van without hitting a single person, and for that I rule! Now give me a dollar." I didn't give him a dollar. I'm sorry, but successfully driving a van does not earn you a tip. You didn't even get up from your seat to help with the luggage, in fact you had a little sign saying you weren't allowed to help with luggage. Screw you, no tip!
I feel the most guilty about not tipping the tour guide. He was really great, even giving us a free hat when jparks had to swim into a pond to retrieve a lost baggie of cocaine. But the tour was expensive. And it was one of those times when I wasn't really sure if tipping was appropriate. And I didn't think we had any cash. Just call us stupid tourists. If the guilt gets bad enough I might mail him a check as a late tip. Man, I'm a wimp.
I know there were other times jparks and I felt pressured into tipping (the bellman that drove us in the hotel van a fourth of a mile to the other part of the hotel) but resisted. Call us stingy, call us cheap, but sometimes tipping is not necessary.
Maybe I should start a virtual tip jar on my sidebar. Hey folks, I drove to work today without running anyone over, can I have a dollar? Maybe Lily can tip me each time I take her out to pee. Two bucks each trip should be acceptable, don't you think?
Tuesday, July 3, 2007
one year down
Today is jparks and I's first wedding anniversary. So for everyone that had the "they won't make it one year" squares on the betting pool, please know you have lost. Losers! Contact your local bookies to replace your bets. You can pick any day from "a year and a day" to 50 years. Why up to 50 years? After that point in time all bets are off and I get a medal for lasting that long. I mean, come on folks, we're talking about jparks here, 50 years will be quite the feat. Even I think I'll probably strangle him around year 46. I love him, but the chewing! With his mouth open! Just thinking about it makes my blood pressure rise.
So, how are we celebrating our anniversary? By hiking to some waterfalls and having dinner at Mama's Fish House. My anniversary gift from jparks was a fancy pants pair of Maui Jim sunglasses. They came from the same store that Paris Hilton was recently photographed shopping in so I now consider her and I best friends. She's going to let me be her exclusive photographer from here out. I'm going to be very rich as soon as I sell the first batch of pictures to Star magazine.
My gift to jparks was a pair of teva water shoes. He's going to claim that he bought his own water shoes and they weren't a gift from me, but don't listen. He's wrong and has a hard time accepting that. And while they won't bring him friendships with famous people, like my sunglasses, they are still a pretty good gift. Or at least that's what I'm telling him so he doesn't realize he got the shaft this anniversary. Because nothing says "Happy Year Anniversary! I love you! No really I do, I just forgot to get you a real gift because I was busy before we left for vacation and my life is hectic, but I love you!" quite like water shoes.
So, how are we celebrating our anniversary? By hiking to some waterfalls and having dinner at Mama's Fish House. My anniversary gift from jparks was a fancy pants pair of Maui Jim sunglasses. They came from the same store that Paris Hilton was recently photographed shopping in so I now consider her and I best friends. She's going to let me be her exclusive photographer from here out. I'm going to be very rich as soon as I sell the first batch of pictures to Star magazine.
My gift to jparks was a pair of teva water shoes. He's going to claim that he bought his own water shoes and they weren't a gift from me, but don't listen. He's wrong and has a hard time accepting that. And while they won't bring him friendships with famous people, like my sunglasses, they are still a pretty good gift. Or at least that's what I'm telling him so he doesn't realize he got the shaft this anniversary. Because nothing says "Happy Year Anniversary! I love you! No really I do, I just forgot to get you a real gift because I was busy before we left for vacation and my life is hectic, but I love you!" quite like water shoes.
Saturday, June 30, 2007
things I've learned in Maui thus far
Thursday, June 28, 2007
aloha!
We are officially off to Maui! For the record I didn't get my legs waxed because the hairs didn't grow fast enough. I hold each one of you personally accountable for this, due to not enough oomph in your grow, hairs, grow chants.
Check back for pictures soon. Pictures of Maui, not of my unwaxed legs. Because pictures of those would just be uncalled for.
Check back for pictures soon. Pictures of Maui, not of my unwaxed legs. Because pictures of those would just be uncalled for.
Monday, June 25, 2007
wax on
All together now, with oomph: Grow, leg hairs, GROW!
See, we're leaving for Maui on Thursday and I really wanted to get my legs waxed before we left. But stupid me shaved about a week and a half ago and the leg hair isn't really long enough to wax. Normally I don't mind that it's slow growing but right now I want it to grow faster. I'm using all my energy to will it to grow faster. Grow little hairs! GROW!
Jparks and I are starting the packing process (yes, it's a process with us) and I'm working on toiletries, including, but not limited to, sunscreen:
It's a bit excessive, isn't it? I plan on being the one person to go to Hawaii and not get a tan. And to scare everyone else with my blinding legs. My blinding legs with, hopefully, no hair on them.
See, we're leaving for Maui on Thursday and I really wanted to get my legs waxed before we left. But stupid me shaved about a week and a half ago and the leg hair isn't really long enough to wax. Normally I don't mind that it's slow growing but right now I want it to grow faster. I'm using all my energy to will it to grow faster. Grow little hairs! GROW!
Jparks and I are starting the packing process (yes, it's a process with us) and I'm working on toiletries, including, but not limited to, sunscreen:
It's a bit excessive, isn't it? I plan on being the one person to go to Hawaii and not get a tan. And to scare everyone else with my blinding legs. My blinding legs with, hopefully, no hair on them.
Tuesday, May 22, 2007
proof that I'm not totally unreasonable
Last night the flip flops that I ordered for jparks to wear on vacation arrived and he happily put them on and pranced around the apartment. Are you thinking "It's just flip flops, why such excitement?" Well, I don't let jparks own flip flops. Mean of me? Yes. Weird of me? Yes. Hypocritical of me? Yes. (I own many pairs) Do I care? Nope.
In my mind men can't wear flip flops. In fact, men can't wear sandals at all. Once, before we were together, jparks took me shopping with him so I could tell him what color everything was. Towards the end of the shopping expedition he mentioned that he needed to pick up some new Tevas and I begged and pleaded with him to FORGO THE TEVAS FOR THE LOVE OF GOD. No woman was ever going to date him if he wore Tevas! How would he ever find happiness?!? Didn't he want to get laid? Tevas were not going to help him with that quest. He didn't listen and bought a pair. He still has them and I would love to make them magically disappear one day, but I know he'll just go buy another pair. And the more pairs of shoes he buys the less money we have for me to buy shoes. Priorities, people, priorities.
So last night, the arrival of flip flops for him was enough to cause celebration to break out. He happily wore them to take out the trash and to walk Lily. He kept mentioning them in conversation. So, being the big meanie that I am, I squashed his fantasy future that was filled with flip flop visions and told him the truth.
And, of course, the truth was not pretty or nice. The truth was that I purposely bought cheap flip flops for him so that I wouldn't feel guilty leaving them in the hotel in Hawaii when we check out. Yeah, I hate flip flops on men so much I plan on leaving his there. Normally I'm sneaky and wouldn't have told him I was ditching his flip flops, but I couldn't handle a month of hearing how great they are. How simple! How easy! How his life is now complete and he has found god in the form of shoes and his soul is saved. I had to shut him up the only way I know how, by crushing his spirit.
His response to this to the truth? "How come you get to wear flip flops and I don't?"
"Because I get pedicures. I earn the right to wear flip flops."
"Can I get a pedicure?"
And as much as it pains me to admit it, yes, if jparks gets pedicures he can wear flip flops. I am a defeated woman.
In my mind men can't wear flip flops. In fact, men can't wear sandals at all. Once, before we were together, jparks took me shopping with him so I could tell him what color everything was. Towards the end of the shopping expedition he mentioned that he needed to pick up some new Tevas and I begged and pleaded with him to FORGO THE TEVAS FOR THE LOVE OF GOD. No woman was ever going to date him if he wore Tevas! How would he ever find happiness?!? Didn't he want to get laid? Tevas were not going to help him with that quest. He didn't listen and bought a pair. He still has them and I would love to make them magically disappear one day, but I know he'll just go buy another pair. And the more pairs of shoes he buys the less money we have for me to buy shoes. Priorities, people, priorities.
So last night, the arrival of flip flops for him was enough to cause celebration to break out. He happily wore them to take out the trash and to walk Lily. He kept mentioning them in conversation. So, being the big meanie that I am, I squashed his fantasy future that was filled with flip flop visions and told him the truth.
And, of course, the truth was not pretty or nice. The truth was that I purposely bought cheap flip flops for him so that I wouldn't feel guilty leaving them in the hotel in Hawaii when we check out. Yeah, I hate flip flops on men so much I plan on leaving his there. Normally I'm sneaky and wouldn't have told him I was ditching his flip flops, but I couldn't handle a month of hearing how great they are. How simple! How easy! How his life is now complete and he has found god in the form of shoes and his soul is saved. I had to shut him up the only way I know how, by crushing his spirit.
His response to this to the truth? "How come you get to wear flip flops and I don't?"
"Because I get pedicures. I earn the right to wear flip flops."
"Can I get a pedicure?"
And as much as it pains me to admit it, yes, if jparks gets pedicures he can wear flip flops. I am a defeated woman.
Saturday, February 17, 2007
my rent is about to go way up
Yesterday, after enduring 7 hours of horrible traffic, jparks and I arrived at the most amazing bed and breakfast I have ever stayed in. In honesty it's the only true b&b I've ever stayed in so it didn't have a lot of competition, but still the place is niiice.
We are staying in the Juliet room, and while it's a bit on the lavender side, I am completely enamored with it and its huge spa tub that I swam laps in last night. I told jparks that I would like to live in this place and he laughed this off as just another one of those things I say but don't mean, like "sure, I'll stop buying shoes" and "yeah, we'll have sex tonight"
But this time I mean it. I figured out that rent would be about $6200 per month. I'm still working out how we can afford that since it's more than we make each month, but I'm smart so I'll work something out. Maybe Lily can stop eating premium dog food and switch to store brand.
Now please excuse me, coffee and breakfast are being served downstairs and missing it would be a waste of my rent money.
We are staying in the Juliet room, and while it's a bit on the lavender side, I am completely enamored with it and its huge spa tub that I swam laps in last night. I told jparks that I would like to live in this place and he laughed this off as just another one of those things I say but don't mean, like "sure, I'll stop buying shoes" and "yeah, we'll have sex tonight"
But this time I mean it. I figured out that rent would be about $6200 per month. I'm still working out how we can afford that since it's more than we make each month, but I'm smart so I'll work something out. Maybe Lily can stop eating premium dog food and switch to store brand.
Now please excuse me, coffee and breakfast are being served downstairs and missing it would be a waste of my rent money.
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