festering

This might come as a surprise, but I am not a chipper person by nature. I can fake it when I need to, like at work meetings or family events so I don't scare my relatives, but my general temperament is kind of pissy. Not to point fingers, but I blame my grandfather on my father's side for this. He was a piss and vinegar old man, but in a nice way, which is also a pretty accurate description of me. While most would say I run closer to sarcastic than cranky old man, I will be the first to correct them by admitting the sarcasm is just my way of softening the crankiness. And besides if I were to go full cranky old man at the age of 29, what will I have to look forward to when I'm 80? I mean other than pooping in a diaper because woohoo! nothing says good times like crapping yourself.

My pissiness was something I was always able to control and dial back as needed, but lately I have been mad at the world and I can't make it stop. I'll see something in my google reader and I won't even be able to finish reading the post because OMG, MY HEAD WILL EXPLODE FROM ANGER. Or Twitter, I probably shouldn't even start about Twitter. I've had to remove certain twitter-ers from being sent to my phone because I am certain if I didn't, I would throw my phone down the garbage disposal. (Of course I didn't remove you. And your blog never makes me angry. I love you, you are awesome)

I don't want to be all "ha, one more crappy thing about pregnancy!" but honestly this is one more crappy thing I wasn't expecting. I can feel that my hormones are all over the damn placel and yet I can't take the reigns and control them. One minute I'm fine and the next I'm crying, complete with big, air sucking sobs. And then I'm immediately fiery mad and poor jparks is the one crying because holy crap who is this hellbeast that claims to be his wife?

Here's a list of things that I've gotten incredibly mad about lately:

Douche face Emeril Lagasse being the guest judge on Top Chef's semi finale

jparks "watching" a tv show with me while playing on the computer and then asking a question about what's going on every five seconds (bonus anger if he asks the same question multiple times)

The Home Owner's Association for our neighborhood. Seriously people, I will go to your house and break things if you don't come out here and fix the leak in my garage

People that want to buy my furniture on craigslist and then never reply when I contact them about arranging pick up

When jparks says "I'm going to tweak your hooters" while we're debating something important. Seriously? Tweak my hooters? I will kill you and everyone would understand once I tell them what you've said. In fact, I think people will crown me a saint for not killing you sooner.

The fact that I can't order a king cake until March. And that it's going to cost me $45, when I would never have paid more than $10 for one in NOLA

And don't even get me started on Mardi Gras. I'm unemployed, I don't have to ask for time off of work. I should be at Mardi Gras this year.

Anything else that happens to me, near me, or around me. The rain? It pisses me off. The netflix site going down for an hour yesterday? ANGER. The damn kids that won't stay off my lawn? I shake my cane at them.

I am truly a ball of sunshine.