Tuesday, September 15, 2009

help wanted

Sunday night I placed an ad on craigslist under the domestic gigs category. Basically I had spent the day staring at my massive pile of clean laundry and just couldn't take it anymore, so I posted explaining that I was looking for someone to help me fold, iron, and put away laundry once a week, and if time permits, take care of some other light housework. I offered to pay hourly, but since I have no idea what this kind of light housework should pay, I asked people to name their own pay rates.

Before we go any farther, let me give you two pieces of advice:

1. If you ever want blog fodder, post an ad on craigslist, because the responses! Holy hell, the responses are awesome.
2. When you post an ad on craigslist, don't use your main email address. Even though I had them make my email anonymous, my inbox has been flooded with responses. Seriously, we're talking over 150 so far.

At this point I'm not certain I'll end up hiring anyone because really, can't I handle doing my own laundry? (ha, I couldn't do my own laundry before life with a baby) But I am certain I need to share some of the responses with you:

"I'm a proud American, born on American soil." Wow, is someone a little xenophobic? I wonder what part of my ad made them think I'm looking specifically for an American. And not just some pansy-ass-not-proud American, but a Proud! American! who was born on American! Soil! America, Fuck Yeah! How awesome would it be if this person found out they were born in Canada because their parents were on vacation and their mom went into labor while there? What would they put on their cover letters if that were the case? How could they live with themselves?

"I like to foil clothes. I like clothes to be foiled like in stores." Thanks, but I've got all my foil hat needs met at this time.

"I would like to work for you. I like to do laundry. I don't iron." Ironing is the majority of what I need done. In fact, it says it right there in the ad. Perhaps next you could apply to be an astronaut. "I would like to travel. I like spaceships. I don't want to leave the Earth"

"I have experience with basic housekeeping. I can help you for $50 an hour." So wait, let me make sure I understand this, you want $50 an hour to do my laundry? Is this code for a prostitute? Have I stumbled on to some kind of secret craigslist sex ring? "Hey baby I love doing laundry, can I fluff your towel with my mouth?" And if we're not talking about $50 an hour for sex, is this person crazy? I want to email her back and say that if I could afford to pay her that much wouldn't I already have a full staff to attend to my every need?

Out of over 100 responses, three look promising because they are college students who could potentially become baby sitters. The rest of the applicants are either too crazy to allow into my house or too expensive for anything other than sex. Who knew good help was so hard to find.

8 comments:

  1. Can I be your long-distance babysitter? I'm only $10/hr and I'll wash/iron/fold/foil your laundry if there is any downtime for FREESIES. ;)

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  2. A wise person told me once that it's nearly impossible to be a good housekeeper, mother and wife all at once. She suggest I choose 2 and get help with the third. Now I am just starting to get into a routine and keep everything sorted. I think I might be asking for the name of the person you hire come feb!

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  3. I told you: NO ONE does all that ironing. Not even people on Craigslist!

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  4. Can your housekeepers help with the folding, ironing, and putting away of the laundry? and/or Is there a wash-and-fold anywhere near your house? I used wash-and-fold when I lived in the city b/c it was too much of a pain to haul clothes up and over a hill to get to the laundrymat, and it was great.

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  5. Man, if I lived back in the Bay Area, I would totally do it! Not that I love doing laundry, but that seems like the easiest money ever. I need to start perusing Craigslist.

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  6. I had a job as a "nanny" in college. But, what I really did was iron dress shirts. I hated that damn job.

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  7. Do you belong to your local Las Madres group? http://www.clubexpress.com/content.aspx?page_id=0&club_id=177487 If they have a mailing list, they probably have a nanny/mother's helper/housekeeper/other recommendation list. What you're looking for falls under either housekeeper or Mother's helper (someone not quite ready to be a babysitter, but almost--usually a neighborhood teen).

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  8. sitter city dot com is where I found help with hiring someone to do laundry and dishes.

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