Last night, during aerial acrobatics, I managed to give myself the most painful, disgusting, stomach turning injury possible. I pulled my thumb nail off of its nail bed. Yeah, fucking hell, it was bad.
I was hanging from my knees when I tried to scoop up towards the bar with my hands. One hand hit the bar, bending the nail backwards. BACKWARDS. It took a second for the pain to sink in, but when it did it was enough to make me want to gnaw my thumb off because that pain could only be less than the pain I was currently in. I managed to jam my thumb into my mouth to start the gnawing process, but this flipped the nail back into its bed. (Are you still reading? Yes?!? Wow, good for you with the iron stomach) I managed to get myself to the ground when I noticed the blood. At this point I was pretty sure passing out was next on my list of things to do.
While we were taping the nail down jparks came over to ask what was wrong. Patrick told him I bent my nail backwards and I was going to lose it eventually. Again, that need to pass out came back. I swear, nothing creeps me out more than darkened nails that are on their way to falling off. The fact that this was going to happen to me, makes me all light headed and woozy. The rest of aerial class was spent sulking around and pouting about my nail. It's pretty hard to get motivated to try new tricks when your every thought is consumed with the idea of being thumbnail-less.
When we got home last night I took the tape off the nail and immediately freaked out. I had to retape it before the urge to start gnawing at my thumb came back. I've downgraded to a band-aid today, but I think I'll stay in band-aid mode for quite a while. I'm not sure I can handle looking at a black nail everyday, and when the nail hits the point where it's peeling off, I don't know what I'm going to do. I might die. Or go into hiding, and stay drunk enough that I won't have any clue what's going on. Anyone want to volunteer to rip their nail backwards so we can go into hiding together? pleeease?
Eww Regan, that made my stomach do flip flops! I hope that after if falls off it grows back quickly, so you won't have a lifetime of a nailless thumb.
ReplyDeleteyeah...barf!!!!
ReplyDeleteThat's really gross! You could paint your other nails black and just pretend you're having a goth/emo moment? Wait a minute .... that might be worse than having a blackened nail that's about to fall out. You might start wearing clothes that drip in cheap, acrylic black lace and stuff. And all that eyeliner, which is a major part of crinkling in old age smooshing the face around with eyeliner pencils. Crinkling gothness or sucking it up and dealing with your injury like a jock?
ReplyDeleteTotally gross. I couldn't read all of it but what I caught was gross. My sympathies. I wouldn't be able to handle it.
ReplyDeletethat isnt as bad as what happened to me last week.. i was loading up my dirt bike and my thumb slipped in the sprocket and chain lucky for me it was only the tip and the chain was loose well 10 stiches on the bottom of my thumb later and a compleatly torn off thumb nail that the docter sewed back on im on these really good pain meds and dont feel a whole lot of pain cant wait till the prescription runs out thats really going to suck doc says 6-8 months till mine compl grows back
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