you can dress me up, but don't try to take me out

Tomorrow is jparks' company's Holiday Party and I reluctantly bought a new dress for it. Why reluctantly? Because I had a dress that I've only worn twice, that would have been fine, but jparks decided he has seen me in it too much and I should get a new dress. And his preference was one that was not strapless and a-line, which is the basic design of every dress I own. (when you find a fit that works you tend to stick with it).

One day, while wandering around various stores, I found this dress:

It was cute, but not something I would normally buy, which I knew would make jparks happy. Empire waisted with cream trim on the arms, all cut from velvet, I knew I was going out on a limb when I brought the dress to the register but, dammit, I was determined to try something new!

I waited until I was home, in the privacy of my own apartment, to try it on. It turns out the dress fits, kinda. It fits in a way that makes me look knocked up. Or like I'm wearing a tent. And a whole troop of kids could camp out under me and have plenty of room to play campfire games and tell ghost stories. So basically, it does the exact opposite of what my tried and true strapless a-line cut dresses do, it makes me look pretty big.

So here's the dilemma, do I wear the dress and make jparks happy (he has seen me in it and hasn't commented one way or another about it) or do I dig through my closet and find an alternative?

At this point, since the party is tomorrow, I think I'm just going to wear it. It's got a little girl look about it, so I'm going tonight to hunt for some tights and patent leather, high heel mary janes to wear with it. And to complete the look I'm going have Lauren make me a little sign to wear that says "this dress is supposed to make me look pregnant"

Or maybe I'll tell everyone at the party that I am pregnant, and could they swing by the bar and grab me another martini, please?